Crap! (One Girl's Quest for Fiber)

***Caution! This blog falls under the category of "over-share"!***

I have an emotional stomach. When I get upset, stressed or nervous I get diarrhea. It has been this way since I was a child. My parents used to think it was because I ate too fast. They always used to tell me to slow down and take smaller bites. Thus, I am a VERY slow eater and chew my food approximately 1,000 times before swallowing (this is a source of great amusement for my husband.)

As I have got older, my problems got worse. I would "get sick" (this is the nice way to say explosive diarrhea) almost every time I ate. My doctor put me on all sorts of different medications but none of them worked. I had multiple tests and was poked and prodded repeatedly before it was determined that I had Irritable Bowel Syndrome. This basically means that there was no discernible reason that I had to run to the bathroom after every meal. I wasn't allowed to take aspirin or Pepto Bismol (because it contains aspirin, which irritates the stomach) but I practically lived on Immodium AD. I would always worry about eating out because what if I "got sick" while I was out with my friends? (This actually happened when I was on a date once. I missed about half of the movie. Talk about awkward...)

Since my children were born I have been very conscious of what I eat (I want to be the hot mommy!) and because of that (and the "crazy girl pills" which help with the stress and the nerves) the "getting sick" has slowed down. (By slowed down, I mean that it has become less frequent as slow would not be a word that I use to describe diarrhea.) However, it has been replaced by my new nemesis - constipation. I don't quite understand what is happening to my body. It has done a complete 180. I can't stray from my "diet" at all without getting cobbed up. I drink tons of water, eat my active culture yogurt and oatmeal everyday (not together), and consume lots of roughage. I have tried "aids" as well -teas, laxatives, stool softeners and even suppositories once (by far one of the MOST degrading moments of my life.)

I always am looking for high fiber food. Beans, special bread and cereal, fiber bars, fiber injected cottage cheese, dark green lettuce - I eat it all. I don't think I can possibly get any more fiber into my body short of eating bark and I still can't go! What the hell is wrong with my body? Apparently my body is a lot like my mind - I go from one extreme to the other. I am going to continue my journey to get as much fiber into my body as possible while attempting to lead a normal life. This is the only time in my life I have ever wanted to be regular...